The Wicker Man

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The sun shines on Scotland for 2 days every decade. Due to the lack of anything resembling a summer, the fields of Scotland are unable to grow any crops.

And so many moons ago, the Scots were left with a choice – either move south to England, or turn to dark pagan ritual. The Scots chose eternal damnation in the rings of hell rather than a lifetime with the English.

Every year, during what the pagan Scots smirkingly call summer, a giant man made out of Wicker is constructed. Inside this structure, the locals place live goats, sheep, cows, chickens and, of course, a Christian or a policeman. The Wicker Man is then set ablaze, sacrificing the animals and Christian, whilst all celebrate in song and dance. If the gods are so pleased with the sacrifice, Scotland is able to produce crops for another year.

The 1973 documentary, The Wickerman, captured the annual event.

I know. I share your unease with this dark pagan ritual. Burning Christians and cops is one thing, but goats have feelings and character… I guess its for the greater good. The greater good.

This year, I headed to the Wickerman Festival to investigate further. Let’s check it out.

One Response to “The Wicker Man”

  1. The documentary… 😛

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